Farewell!

PKA Farewell Night. It was as though just yesterday that we celebrated our seniors' graduation. Oh how time flies! I was looking back at the things that I wrote to my seniors, last time punya blog post..and now i'm saying the same thing to myself. hahaha

I still remember how I felt when I first came in and the first few people whom I met in PKA. PKA has been a place for growth when I first came in as a young christian, a place where I discover more about myself and God, a place where I meet true precious friends (even though from different denominations) who will cheer me on as I run and walk with me through my ups and downs. 

When we were juniors back then..in 2011

And now, Tadaa..! Our juniors! :)

"Surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses
Let us run the race not only for the prize
But as those who've gone before us
Let us leave to those behind us
The heritage of faithfulness passed on through godly lives"

-Song: Find us Faithful-

I know that it will not be easy for many of the graduating seniors to leave behind something that is so precious and dear to them.. but may we continue to run this race with our eyes fixed on Jesus. So that at the end of our walk with God here on earth, we can echo what Paul said in 2 Timothy 4:7, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith."

Let us not just run well 

but finish well :)

Post GE 13

After GE 13, I was talking to a few christian friends about the whole election thingy..As we were talking, I was questioning myself and reflecting on how I responded towards the current situation in Malaysia.

I was reading this book called the 'Bible and the Ballot' and there are really some good points that the authors pointed out which include;

"True change will only come when sinners are transformed by the gospel. No human leader can bring this about. But as representatives of the coming kingdom of God, Christians are to live by Kingdom of God, Christians are to live by Kingdom values in every sphere of it. And this includes coming out to vote."

"Must not give in to politics of hatred or ridicule."

"And at the end of the day, I know Jesus is coming back to usher in the new heaven and the new earth, so I know that righteousness, justice and compassion will win in the end. In the meantime, miracles are always possible. That is God's responsibility. My responsibility is to do the right thing."

"To pray is to reckon that the One who has the final say is God. By praying, we communicate hope instead of defeat."

"To love the enemy is to acknowledge his weaknesses and struggles and to recognise that the nature of political life is always in the process of development and change. While we are open to reconciliation with those who persecute us, we must not shy away from political engagement nor neglect our duty to secure basic human rights for society at large."

In the midst of speaking up, am I reflecting His values? In the midst of standing up for what is right, am I blinded by hatred or anger? As much as I want to see a better Malaysia,I need to keep in mind that all earthly kingdoms will soon fade away..only His Kingdom will last for eternity. I need to remember to live by Kingdom values and draw people into His Kingdom. I need to keep my focus on eternity. 

And Timothy posted on Enzyme Agents forum, "Whether BN is the government or not, please don't give up on them. As much as we want to see change don't neglect praying for God to purify their hearts and change them from within as well. Because the God I know still loves them and has not and will never give up on them. Don't let the hate for their actions blind you from the fact that our Lord Jesus Christ died on the cross for them too. He came to seek and save the lost.", 
which made me realised how much more I need to pray for the current government..for their salvation..and that I should remind myself again and again - to attack issues, not individuals..and hate sins, not sinners. There is so much more to learn.. change, I must!

PKA 2012/2013 - From the Inside Out

The excos who journeyed with me;

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart 

for every single contribution and support that was given to me :)

It has not been a smooth-sailing journey 
but it has been a worth-sailing journey :) 

God has been so real to each and everyone of us, 
He still is..and He never changes.

As for me, my God never fails :)

STOMP Timor Leste

Hello! :) After stepping down, my focus now is on Timor Leste mission trip that I will be participating in July with a few students and 2 FES staff :) Before signing up, I was praying about it and a bit concerned la, not sure whether my parents would allow me to go to Timor Leste (not a developed country, in fact, it is a very poor country)..but ta daa, they said 'Yes!' and I got selected :) :)

Dili, Timor Leste :) the one with a red dot.

This mission trip called STOMP TL (Students Together On Mission Partnership, Timor Leste) is organized by the Fellowship of Evangelical Students (FES) Malaysia and is in partnership with International Fellowship of Evangelical Students (IFES), East Asia. I would need to raise a minimum of RM4,000 (estimated figure) for the trip. So yes, I'm raising funds now haha if you're interested to partner with me, please let me know :) the amount doesn't matter, I would really appreciate your support and your heart for this mission :)

All funds that I have raised will go to towards a team pool to cover the expenses of the entire mission trip. The reason why we are asked to raise funds is so that we will experience what is like to be sent and allow others who might not be able to participate in this mission trip to be a part of it. Your giving is a form of sending me and allowing yourself to partner in this mission trip even though you cannot be physically present there :D

Just to give you a clearer picture of what's happening in Timor Leste, because I think many of us have not heard of this country haha, below is the excerpt from a report written by Ms. Annette (IFES East Asia Staff) :)

"With a population of 1.2 million people in Timor Leste (TL) and a 150,000 in Dili itself, the country and its people are very moving to the heart. Having been colonialized by both the Portugese and the Indonesians, the people are coming out of the shadows and trying to learn what it means to be a country of their own since 2002.

The Timorese are simple people, with a fierce pride in who they are, yet at the same time, trying to find the confidence to throw off the weight of only having basic education; finding a way to feed themselves and their often large families; finding opportunities to get jobs very hard. Joblessness among the Timorese is very high, and many just while away their time, sitting around drinking and smoking and going home to eat plain rice (when it is really down times).

With rising joblessness, there is also rising violence in the country. Many young people belong to gangs and spend their time drinking, smoking and fighting. There are also many children and adults begging. Children and women abuse is high. In fact, TL records the highest index in women and child abuse in Asia..."

So if you are interested to join us in partnership and be part of this mission, please please please let me know :) I will send you the letter for more details. However, do not have to feel obliged to give because I believe my God is a God who provides :D Pray with us? :)

My prayer is still the same.. is that God will break my heart for what breaks His :)

'It is finished!'

Yesterday, we had AGM and closing for this sidang. The night before I was preparing a speech for AGM and the video compilation for PKA Closing. It never hit me until then.. that I truly love this family, a lot. I always thought that AGM would be the day that I look forward to, ever since the first day I step up as the President..when different people came and asked me, 'So how you feel ah, AGM this friday?'.. I would reply,'Yay!', 'Good!' or 'Can't wait!' haha.. but surprisingly that night, my heart was a bit sayang to let go. I know it is time to let go and let the younger ones to step up. haha just that.. sayang-lah.. It has been a big part of me; bangun PKA, tidur PKA haha nah just kidding. Looking back at all the past photos and videos, they bring me a lot of laughter, sweet memories and reminders of God's goodness in PKA. It has been a great journey :) I want to thank you, fellow friends, who have journeyed with me and cheered me on! I thank God for His faithfulness for this past sidang. Without Him, I wouldn't be able to make it.

And now..it is finished! :)
All Glory to Jesus.

God, why?

So this was what happened at night on 5th of May; When Fong Wan came into the room, I was already lying on my bed because I was dead tired..but I haven't fallen asleep. And she asked, 'Carmen, let's pray?' Then I replied, 'I cannot pray..' I actually didn't expect that to come out from my mouth.. but really, I didn't know what to pray anymore. Deep inside, I was questioning and doubting God. I can't comprehend His plan.. Why is He allowing all these? How can this be a good plan to prosper and not to harm us? Just like how Habakkuk cried out, 'How long o Lord?' (Habakkuk 1:2), I too felt the same.

Decided to go for all churches combined prayer at EPCC just now. And what struck me most is when Pr. Sam said, "You won't go wrong when you celebrate Jesus!" How true. Just when we don't know what to do or where we are heading towards, all the more we need to look to Jesus. One of the worship songs that moved me to tears was 'God of this City',

You're the God of this City 

You're the King of these people 
You're the Lord of this nation 
You are 

You're the Light in this darkness 

You're the Hope to the hopeless 

You're the Peace to the restless 

You are 

If you ask me now, I seriously still can't comprehend His plan.. but now, I'm reassured that His plans are good simply because He is a good God. God loves Malaysia even much more than I do. I know He has not forgotten our land. I know He will bring restoration and He is at work. Habakkuk also never expect God to raise up Babylonians, God always does things exceedingly abundantly above all that we could ever imagine..and then make us go 'Wow!'. Perhaps God is taking this time to prepare us for the greater things that have yet to come! It's exciting time that we're living in :) I know He has heard every cry and every prayer and all our cries and prayers matter so much to Him :) I will rest in Him and Him alone. Let us be assured too, that though we may sow in tears we will reap with joy! Hidup Rakyat! Hidup Tuhan! (God is alive!) :) 

I know that I will still be angry at some of the latest news (eg; Cina Tsunami) especially when I see them on FB. So I've challenged myself to always pray whenever I feel angry or disappointed, may God grant me wisdom to respond and not react ;) I'm glad I went for Combined Prayer. Now I understand why Peter and John would run to their companions after being released (Acts 4:23). And the first thing they did was they prayed together with fellow believers. So important and crucial. May we not lose sight of this too :)

and Yes, God knows what He is doing.

Today, I'm reminded on the most important element to UBAH. It is not hatred or bitterness. It is love - the love for our nation, our home, Malaysia. If truly I want to see change, let it begin with me. May I grow to love Malaysia each day :) #nomore-emo-emo #bangkit #rakyat #malaysia #love

Thank you, Wai yan, for helping me to see that in your blog post :)