Fourth year, first sem.

Fourth year, first sem. My last sem in university.
Will be leaving for internship next semester. So now, I left about 20 days in USM.. I will still be here for the next semester (after work, balik hostel) but somehow I just sense/know that things will not be the same anymore lah.

I cannot 'feel' like skipping work. I have to go to work. I cannot syiok-syiok play Counter Strike and shout 'Fire in the hole'. I have to get enough sleep so that I won't overslept. I cannot spend as much time with people anymore. It's 8am-5pm :( but I can still jog, i guess haha. This is what they panggil 'Transition'.. Face it, Carmen. Haha okok! I can do this!

Since the beginning of the sem, I know that I won't have much time to get to know the juniors..so I didn't make much effort to know them.. I mean, what can grow in 4 months? Durians? haha but somehow God just brought along side few precious ones..and it was just a short period but macam we have known each other for a long time :) So I'm really thankful for that :)

:) one of the few

Initially, it was difficult to see my batch mates leaving.. and then it seemed also that Bible Exposition and CGs were different without them.. Where are all the noises and inside jokes? :p but then slowly I've also learnt to move on. It was good to reflect back on the good old days but dwelling in it and clinging on the past memories will only make us miss out on the good things that God has in-stored for us.. so seeing you again was really good..and seeing you leave this time was not as hard anymore :) Looking forward to many more memories with you in the future! Hope you had a great birthday!

 

And I'm also thankful for the leftovers haha It was really good to have people like Heavenly Wisdom and Ah Min with me this last semester.. I like the familiarity! They know me well lah. and Woon, it has been good to spend a bit more time with you this sem compared to last sem :) Thank you for always being there for me! and you're just a whatsapp away! haha Btw, I still enjoy shouting in your ear until today :D

:)

Also managed to spend a bit more time with my course mates this semester and I'm really glad! :) We had an outing last week and we were just reflecting on the past years and how we first met. I find it soooo funny because they didn't like me last time! haha Pei Man thought I was really sombong because I didn't really talk..and then later on only she found out that I was quiet because I couldn't really speak in Mandarin (but i've improved so much now! :D) hahaha and then Cai Fong was explaining how Lay Ling came back to the room and told her about me when we first met, "Wah Cai Fong, ge bi fang jien de nue shen speaking de leh!" (The girl next door speaks in english!). Aiyo so funny! :D

This year on my birthday, they decorated my room :) with batman logo some more! I was really touched :) I'm just so thankful for them! I probably won't be able to graduate without them..especially Pei Man and Cai Fong, like seriously! haha My room mate has been nice too..Not everyone can tahan my messiness but she can! :D

:)

Minum kopi with Lim Guan Eng :D

I can lift up a gunny sack with just 2 fingers! So kuat, I'm amazed :D

and then, the Malacca boy :) Personally, I'm learning to constantly remember God in this relationship and put Him at the centre.. Sounded so easy when I attended BGR talks or reading books before this. haha I feel like there's so much for me to learn because I can get so selfish at times.. but it's something that I should learn. After all, the bible says nothing about fulfilling our own desires or emotions. It's about dying to ourselves and living our lives for God.

Someone said this, "Being in a relationship reveals how self-absorbed you really are but it also teaches you like nothing else what it means to live not only for yourself. It makes you a bigger person and it makes your world a bigger place because you learn to live more freely, love more generously, endure more patiently and give more unreservedly."

:)

and to you who has been a big part of my uni life,

It wasn't because I don't love you anymore.. just preparing myself to move on :) I'll never forget you and Thank you sooo much for everything!

Will be having my final finals in about 1 week's time. Weeee!

This is not the nicest prawn drawing..hahaha but i like :)

because you are God's gift to me :D weee!

This morning I woke up feeling loved.. 

because I know Daddy sent rain! :D 

Humbling experience

Timor Leste funds has been coming in! Puji Tuhan! :) Like really really! :) :) :D 

Trust me, it's not easy to ask for money..especially when you know your dad is financially capable to provide for you. But it has not been easy too when your family do not understand what mission work is all about ;) STOMP Timor Leste is already teaching me so much even before going to the mission field. This experience as a missionary (raising funds) has really humbled me..it is breaking my pride each time when I send out my sponsorship letter. Each time when people give, whether little or much, my heart is moved.. Thank you for believing in me :') Many times I felt very unworthy of receiving from people.. but because I'm feeling this, I told myself that I won't let them down. I will do my best in the mission field *pray hard*, making sure that they do not sow in vain.

Coming from an average family, my dad has always been providing for me and my family. Hence, I did not learn to trust God in terms of financial provisions..and when Beatrice (FES staff) asked us to raise funds for this mission trip, I was worried, I went blank and I doubted God. RM 4000 is no joke wei. I really prayed hard for the funds hahaha and I tell you, it amazes me each time I see how God bring in funds! Really, macam He knows how much I'm lacking (of course, God knows! :p) and how He always help me to round up the figure hehehe :) Now I can really testify, My God is a God who provides! 

My heart is really filled with thanksgiving to people are supporting me and this mission work that is in Timor Leste :') Thank you for sowing, thank you for believing in me and with me, thank you because all of you have inspired me to sow for eternity :) You have shown me a good example to follow and I want to be like you, my dear givers :) Thank you, thank you.

'It is finished!'

Yesterday, we had AGM and closing for this sidang. The night before I was preparing a speech for AGM and the video compilation for PKA Closing. It never hit me until then.. that I truly love this family, a lot. I always thought that AGM would be the day that I look forward to, ever since the first day I step up as the President..when different people came and asked me, 'So how you feel ah, AGM this friday?'.. I would reply,'Yay!', 'Good!' or 'Can't wait!' haha.. but surprisingly that night, my heart was a bit sayang to let go. I know it is time to let go and let the younger ones to step up. haha just that.. sayang-lah.. It has been a big part of me; bangun PKA, tidur PKA haha nah just kidding. Looking back at all the past photos and videos, they bring me a lot of laughter, sweet memories and reminders of God's goodness in PKA. It has been a great journey :) I want to thank you, fellow friends, who have journeyed with me and cheered me on! I thank God for His faithfulness for this past sidang. Without Him, I wouldn't be able to make it.

And now..it is finished! :)
All Glory to Jesus.

Because He lives

I can face tomorrow

Because He lives

All fear is gone

And because I know, Yes I know,

He holds the future

and life is worth the living just because He lives

Carmen went jogging!

I did something very unusual today. I went jogging.. can you believe it? hahahaha I can't even believe myself :p hahahaha and I'm laughing as I'm typing this hahahaha anyway, yes may the truth set you free! ahahahha

apala, 3 years in USM already, baru first time running on the track

They say better late than neverrr :p 

I went alone..after FES thanksgiving and office dedication service haha but it was so nice! :) I wanted to jog 3 rounds only but then I managed to complete 4.. (bangga haha) and then it started raining, so I stopped. I think I will challenge myself to do 5 next time :D 

After jogging, I was sitting at the top area there..so nice! and I was reflecting a bit la, sign of aging haha on these 3 years here in USM.. I can't help but to be very grateful to God..how He has been good to me.. and still is :) time flies.

I was also thinking la about the things that I want to do for this coming long semester break.. still not sure. There are friends who suggest to me the things that I can do..things which I think will be good for me too.. but I think it's time for me to ask God, "What do You want me to do? since You know what's best for me." still praying ;)

Let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.

it was really a good me-and-God time.

"Start well, finish well."

Hello Sem 2!

Today, I received a very timely gift from Sheryn in church. She didn't know that I will be starting my new semester tomorrow.. and she just said, "When I saw this, I thought of you..because I remember you shared a testimony about this (The Lord is my Shepherd) in church during new year..and the sheep is so cute, it's pink! hahaha".. LOL, Thank you so much Sheryn!! It means so much to me :) :) :) 

This gift came today as a reminder of how God has been faithful for the past semester and He will continue to be faithful for this coming semester :')

and it came with Psalm 126:5 "Those who sow in tears will reap with song of joy."

 mek...mek..mekkkk :D

Yesus menepati janji

On 1st of October 2012, God assured me on a few things which include my studies. The reason why I can remember the date so clearly  was because I wrote down in my journal haha not because of my memory :p I'm 23 but my memory is 100 years old. He said, "Don't worry.. I will take care of your studies." I thought I heard wrongly.. but today God reminded me of this promise..and He has fulfilled His promise which I almost forgotten :) I was worried because of the amount of time I spend on my studies! and I took 2 minor papers last sem.. you don't play-play with political science haha.. so i'm actually only aiming for ok-ok results la. For a person who barely know Malaysian politics, now studying international relations.. world war I, world war II, Cold war, all those! Mike and Tien used to laugh at me for thinking that Bangkok is in Cambodia:( I was hoping to get at least B- lo but I got B+ nyehnyehnyeh.. and I was just hoping to pass my Philosophy of Politics.. but I got B+ too.. I can only say "Wow" and "Thank You!"... It can't be just my own effort because I'm actually quite stupid one..hahaha i'm serious k! 
so yeah, Thank you Jesus! :D 

God keeps His promises

because He is not a liar :)

ps: Let us also learn to praise God even when our results are not like what we desired..because after all, He was the one guiding us through the process and working behind the scenes without us knowing ..He is very good one leh! :)

Psalm 23

The Lord is my shepherd

I shall not want

When I am nothing

He is all that I need

Though I may walk through the valley

Though I may sail through the storm

I will not fear cause You are near

Though I may climb the highest mountain

Though I may go through the fire

I will not fear cause You are here

Your goodness and mercy follow me
Your goodness and mercy follow me

All of my days

This song, Psalm 23, accompanied me throughout 
the whole semester :)

The Lord is my shepherd! Hip hip Hurray!
:D

Thank youuuuuuuuuu, God! *hugs*

Hohoho

Nama biskut ini adalah biskut kebahagiaan :D

My room mate is shoooo nice tooo meee!

hohoho

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Happy Sabbath too!

two zero want three

Gave a testimony during Watch Night service on how God has been good to me in 2012. Was actually busy preparing for finals..but then, God is too good that I cannot afford not to share His goodness :) and the thing is, I didn't went up alone :) I went up with a good friend who journeyed alongside me all these years. 

Thank you Joanne! :) It was really a good way to end 2012. It was not just a sharing.. but it was a testimony that came out from a test :) It was a sign of victory, victory that comes from God!! and I'm definitely very proud of you :) God is so real. God is so good!
May we continue to run this race with endurance and perseverance..we do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus :) God will be our source of strength! Weeee!

Maybe Surely goodness and mercy shall 
follow me all the days of my life,

And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Psalm 23:6

:)

Hello, 2013! 

The brothers!

Was complaining to my eldest bro about my studies.. and then so funny the icon! :D

Sometimes I really cannot tahan him :p

Ernest gave me cash as christmas gift! YAY :D i am so loved!

Looking forward to family dinner this Friday at Khuntai!

Again? Yes, Khuntai! weeeeee :D

Merry merry Christmas! :)

Christmas countdown started on Thursday after my presentation :D went for counter strike with some pka-ians! So much fun! :D i like it when we only use knife to stab people instead of using guns and and and i like to hide at places where people least expect! :D

Not bad kan, I still beat Chew Yi Hong wahhahaha! Next time I shall name myself, Carmen the great III.

Met up with Joanne on Friday. She just came back for Christmas holidays :) Winter warmers, Yummy food! :D Thanks for everythingggg! 

Then at night, we went for PKA leaders outing at Khuntai..wahhh Yummy yummy food! and it's so cheap, my gosh! :) It was also a great time of sharing and testifying His faithfulness over our lives and also in PKA!

When we started in Sept, we were like the plain christmas tree that has no ornaments. But along the way, God causes us to bear fruit - in terms of shaping our character, in our walk with Him, seeing our members grow, etc. Tuhan Yesus memang baik :) :)

Serving alongside with a bunch of awesome people! what an honor! :)

Decorated my room with the tree after that hahaha

Saw this sweet little note on Saturday afternoon when I was about to leave USM to Batu Maung for church campus celebration. 

Helped out in the decoration and setting up the place... so I was showing off my girl guide's skill HAHAHA not bad, still remember those knots - square lashings, simpul manuk, all those :p (ps: Tien and Mike, pls take note)

My zaman kegemilangan :p

Unplugged: Under the stars! :) Great job to all those who worked behind the scenes and upfront on the stage! :)

Met up with Elaine on Sunday after service in the library.. study study study till they (pekerja library) switched off the air-conds :( So we went to Starbucks instead.

Had a really good time with Elaine! :D

Yes! Carolling in starbucks by Gateway City Church :)

Although christmas carols are always the same every year, I seriously can't remember the lyrics. I struggle the most with 'Feliz Navidad'.. so whenever the worship team in church sing this song, I make sure I can see the lyrics on the screen.. or else I'll go

Feliz Navidad (Feliz Navidad)

Feliz Navidad (Feliz Navidad)
Feliz Navidad pros.....zi dad!!! :D

Ms. Sun-Maid will accompany me this whole week! I don't normally makan raisins one but then according to Elaine, this is healthy snack! #pengaruhrakansebaya #truestory

Had christmas eve dinner with family yesterday, simple but nice :) and so relaxing! Not so productive in my studies yesterday but..oh well, it's christmas eve yo!

Went to church this morning and ta daaa, my favourite part! :) So cool to see people getting baptised..especially when they share their testimonies :') I'm very happy for Amos and Sheryn, especially Sheryn because the whole family was there.. her parents who are non-christians were there too :) 

My beloved June! :) God's awesome gift to me :) Thank you for the christmas gift.. most importantly, the gift of friendship :) :)

Blessed Christmas everyone!

May you experience the fullness of God as you celebrate the birth of Christ that came to give us life..so that we may have life and have it to the full! :)

despite the paths we chose :p

Ms.Woon will be coming back to Penang in 18 days! weeee! 

It was 6 months ago that u posted this: despite-the-paths-we-chose .
As I look back, I still remember that night when we had our last committee meeting.. the tears too. hahaha :p I still remember you said something like 'I can't be there for you.' Hmm.. yup, you were not here with me physically, but you were with me spiritually (in prayers) and mentally (in your moral support, advices, thoughts, etc) hehe so Tien, I really appreciate all that :) thank you!

I tell you something, there was one time when you shared with me that you might not be able to go to Australia..I secretly felt happy inside hahaha (Confession is good for the soul, they say :p). For a moment, I wanted to pray to God that you would stay..but in the end I did not.. because I thought it would be very selfish of me to do that. I sayang you :) so I prayed alongside you as you asked me to.
You know, even when I was in Camp cam, I kept asking God, "Why la, why not Tien?" haha I always compare myself with you and I feel you are so much better than me, more capable, more mature and wise :) really. But His ways are always higher than our ways. Maybe I should just stop this bad habit of trying to teach God what to do. 

Now, after 6 months, I'm glad that we chose the paths that we chose.. because I believe all these actually made us stronger in our walk with Him :) and it actually shows us how faithful God is in our lives. 

May our lives be a stirring testament to God's sustaining grace. 

I've decided to hug you first when I see you in Jan 

before doing the victory dance together :p

Happy Birthday, Tham Fong Wan! :)

To my dearest friend, 

my 'husband', 

my sanguine and loud species, 

my sister in Christ and 

my prayer warrior, 

HAPPY BLESSED BIRTHDAY TO YOU! :)

It has been a great blessing to have you in my life.

You're one of the greatest gift that I received from God in USM hehee

First Year

I remember us playing monopoly deal in this room during National Conference, shouting and laughing like nobody's business :p and you publicly confessed your love towards Justin back then hahaha so funny!

My first photo with you (only us)! and you made me your 6th wife. What an 'honor'! :p

I will never forget the first time when I met you at Tapak Convo! Sitting right in front of me with your yellow-dyed hair, so scary! With Audrey some more haha

And how you fell down at Michael's station during Theme Talk HAHAHHAHAHA

Second Year

And all of us grew closer after PKA farewell night. It has been a privilege to serve alongside you in this family called PKA :) a place where we also grow in our walk with God as we discover more of ourselves, the people around us and God Himself :)

We may come from different states..but in a way, we actually share the same 'background' hehe thank you for being able to relate to me..and encouraging me along the way :)

Third Year

Thank you for doing crazy things with me :) Thank you for also accepting me for who I am,  for being patient with my flaws and my weaknesses :) 

Thank you for standing alongside me.

Thank you for listening to me.

Thank you for being there for me when I don't know who to turn to.

Thank you for praying for me, my prayer warrior! :)

I always thank God for you.. because your life is such an example. You may not know the bible from Genesis to Revelation.. but you are so teachable and so eager to learn :) and you practice the little that you know.. You've grown so much from the first day when I met you in PKA :) I'm so proud of you! and constantly ask myself to learn from you :)

May Sophia Grace and Ultraman Bobo continue to be great friends even after Sophia Grace  graduates :) May we continue to surrender our lives to the Potter's Hands...His loving hands.

You are fearfully and wonderfully made, 

blessed birthday Fong Wan! :)

ps: Hopefully the next time when we dance, we won't bang into each other AGAIN. seriously.. LOL!

God knew how I felt.. so He sent encouragement! :)

why my God so good leh, you tell me?

:)


You know what I'm going to say

even before I say it, Lord.

You go before me and follow me.

You place Your hand of blessing on my head.

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,

too great for me to understand!
Psalm 139:4-6

tambourine!

I am blessed! :) 
June gave me her tambourine last Friday because she will be leaving to Australia in January. She said she won't be dancing for quite some time.. so she decided to give it to me :D :D :D
You know, I really like tambourines :) and finally, I have one myself! I'm already making plans for my tambourine.. I will bring it to PKA prayer meetings :D and hopefully Bible Expo too!! YAY! Oh, and I need to get some ribbons for it too! 

Yay!

Terima kasih si Shaun dan Terima kasih si Kah Mun!

membuatkan aku rasa diberkati dan disayangi dan juga gemuk

Yang benar,

Carmen yang gembira! :)