Fourth year, first sem. My last sem in university.
Will be leaving for internship next semester. So now, I left about 20 days in USM.. I will still be here for the next semester (after work, balik hostel) but somehow I just sense/know that things will not be the same anymore lah.
I cannot 'feel' like skipping work. I have to go to work. I cannot syiok-syiok play Counter Strike and shout 'Fire in the hole'. I have to get enough sleep so that I won't overslept. I cannot spend as much time with people anymore. It's 8am-5pm :( but I can still jog, i guess haha. This is what they panggil 'Transition'.. Face it, Carmen. Haha okok! I can do this!
Since the beginning of the sem, I know that I won't have much time to get to know the juniors..so I didn't make much effort to know them.. I mean, what can grow in 4 months? Durians? haha but somehow God just brought along side few precious ones..and it was just a short period but macam we have known each other for a long time :) So I'm really thankful for that :)
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Initially, it was difficult to see my batch mates leaving.. and then it seemed also that Bible Exposition and CGs were different without them.. Where are all the noises and inside jokes? :p but then slowly I've also learnt to move on. It was good to reflect back on the good old days but dwelling in it and clinging on the past memories will only make us miss out on the good things that God has in-stored for us.. so seeing you again was really good..and seeing you leave this time was not as hard anymore :) Looking forward to many more memories with you in the future! Hope you had a great birthday!
And I'm also thankful for the leftovers haha It was really good to have people like Heavenly Wisdom and Ah Min with me this last semester.. I like the familiarity! They know me well lah. and Woon, it has been good to spend a bit more time with you this sem compared to last sem :) Thank you for always being there for me! and you're just a whatsapp away! haha Btw, I still enjoy shouting in your ear until today :D
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Also managed to spend a bit more time with my course mates this semester and I'm really glad! :) We had
an outing last week and we were just reflecting on the past years and how we first met. I find it soooo funny because they didn't like me last
time! haha Pei Man thought I was really sombong because I didn't really
talk..and then later on only she found out that I was quiet because I couldn't really speak
in Mandarin (but i've improved so much now! :D) hahaha and then Cai Fong
was explaining how Lay Ling came back to the room and told her about me when we first met, "Wah Cai Fong, ge bi fang jien de nue shen speaking de leh!" (The girl next door speaks in english!). Aiyo so funny! :D
This year on my birthday, they decorated my room :) with batman logo some more! I was really touched :) I'm just so thankful for them! I probably won't be able to graduate without them..especially Pei Man and Cai Fong, like seriously! haha My room mate has been nice too..Not everyone can tahan my messiness but she can! :D
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| Minum kopi with Lim Guan Eng :D |
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| I can lift up a gunny sack with just 2 fingers! So kuat, I'm amazed :D |
and then, the Malacca boy :) Personally, I'm learning to constantly remember God in this relationship and put Him at the centre.. Sounded so easy when I attended BGR talks or reading books before this. haha I feel
like there's so much for me to learn because I can get so selfish at times..
but it's something that I should learn. After all, the bible says
nothing about fulfilling our own desires or emotions. It's about dying
to ourselves and living our lives for God.
Someone said this, "Being in a relationship reveals how self-absorbed you really are but it also teaches you like nothing else what it means to live not only for yourself. It makes you a bigger person and it makes your world a bigger place because you learn to live more freely, love more generously, endure more patiently and give more unreservedly."
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and to you who has been a big part of my uni life,
It wasn't because I don't love you anymore.. just preparing myself to move on :) I'll never forget you and Thank you sooo much for everything!
Will be having my final finals in about 1 week's time. Weeee!
