ahem ahem ahem

So.. i've been coughing for almost 6 months now! Not the nonstopcoughing24/7 kind of cough, if not you would be attending my funeral by now haha sometimes it's more in the morning..sometimes more at night when I'm about to sleep, sometimes it can be quite frequent and go on for a few hours.. but mostly after I ate spicy or oily food..so I've stopped for some time (huhu my favourite tomyam:( ) sometimes I give in to temptation but most of the time, I was victorious lah :D

I'm now a cough expert haha the best way to sleep at night is to put another pillow on top of your pillow..somehow you won't cough as much, it really works for me! Hot drinks especially honey lemon help to make your throat feel much better one :) Also try to always bring lozenges wherever you go, just in case you start coughing like mad in front of a large crowd (church especially during sermon time!)..very awkward one!

I've seen a few doctors and tried all sorts of medication but.. not much improvement. Don't worry ya, I don't have TB because my X-ray is alright! :D But honestly kinda desperate lor. It can be really frustrating when your sickness just don't go away. Especially when cough for a few hours one ah, my chest feel pain after some time..and then I don't feel like talking to anyone one.. not because I'm anti social..or emo, but because it's really painful and it's very tiring to continue talking.

So recently I've been asking God more often.. Why? I've been praying for healing, believing for healing..Why You have the ability to heal me but yet You are holding it back? Why not just heal me when You can?

Then I was also reminded of Sin Yee, a church friend who suffers partial blindness.. and severe dry eyes problem. Each time when I sit beside her in church, she uses her eye drop every 10-15 minutes..even during worship time. For so many years, the church has been praying for her. She went through operation after operation..yet we are still praying. When I contacted her through whatsapp recently, she can still tell me that God is good to her. Seriously for her to be able to say that, God must be really real.

And the challenge I felt God giving to me is whether I will still love Him and serve Him even if I am not healed? So yesterday's time with God ended with a prayer/worship.

When the darkness closes in Lord, 

still I will say, 'Blessed be Your name'.

You give and take away,

my heart will choose to say, 'Blessed be Your name.' 

 The comfort is I'll be given a new body in heaven anyway :)